Woke up late n took a cab to sch.. sigh.. no $$ alr..

Today, during lunch, I went to draw money to pay for my IEF tb.. bt Wee Hoon wanted it 1st.. so I let her have it.. when going to draw money.. the atm could nt dispense $10 notes anymore.. so I had to make do with $50.. bt I didn't have enough $$ in the bank to draw $50.. sigh...

When we went for AAA tutorial, we thot we were late.. then we waited for the tutor to come.. n when who Zhi Wei claimed to be a Ms turned out to be a Mr.. we gt a shock of our lives.. He's the POA lecturer tt's afraid of ghosts n ordered us to sit in front.. Yah.. TT guy.. when ak saw him.. he's 1st rxn was.. "We can go home alr..."

I went to church for singing aft tt..

Oh.. guess what.. class tutor is Wong Yoke Kuan.. guess who tt is.......

Tutorials r killing me...




HELP...

Went to church today.. saw Mr Toh on the way! He could still recognise me.. n the first thing he said was tt I was getting whiter n whiter.. didn't know where he was heading to with his wife.. it rained heavily in the aftnn.. VERY heavily.. to the extent tt I would name it as "blue whales n elephants"..

Shingo accompanied me to church.. Nat was grounded.. Gt KSS anniversary's door-gift.. it's a diary! :) Nice.. Serene came back frm Bangkok n gt a few of us gals earrings.. I chose an interesting pair for myself.. haha.. Will try to take a pic of it soon..

Ok..

Went to work aft tt.. the chefs seemed to be feasting their eyes out when I entered the kitchen.. sigh.. GUYS...

Work ended a little early today cos the last table left at 930..

Dar.. tc of urself.. I know u're worried.. bt tc of ur health too...

Love u.. *muacks*

Didn't blog yest cos I was too tired..

Smtg happened yest during IEF lecture.. The lecturer is VERY irritating.. Her ATTITUTE is VERY BIG!!! ARGH!!! Can't stand her..

Dar wasn't feeling v happy..

I went down to town.. b4 going to Bishan park.. where I wonderfully became the mosquito feeding ground.. No joke.. I gt like 22 mosquito bites.. itching frm head to toe.. trying so hard nt to scratch...

Today.. went for kb.. gt my arm band.. Jason said tt the training wun be tt tiring.. bt in the end.. it doesn't make a diff.. I still gt v tired..

Went to work aft tt..

Had dinner cum supper.. then came home..

Wrote smtg during work.. Here goes...

I dunno how..
I dunno y..
Whatever u do, or say..
However u act..
ALL have a major impact on me..

Ppl may say tt u're hard to be with..
Tt u're hard to handle..
Hard to understand..
Bt cos I LOVE U..
Tt's y I'm trying hard..

Everytime u scold..
Everytime u stay far..
U send daggers straight at my heart..

Is it cos of stress?
Emotions?
Problems?

Tell me..
Even if I cannot be of much help..
I can be a listening ear..
And a shoulder to cry on..

I LOVE U..
Really do...

Dun stress too much.. I'll always be here for u...

I know tt I didn't blog yest.. it's cos I reached home early in the morning..

Went drinking at Halo Bar with daddy n Allan.. Halo Bar's the bar in sch.. yah.. there's a bar in sch... drank quite a bit.. bt at least daddy was there.. else I wun have drank too..

Today.. had my 1st Social Psychology lesson.. it's great! I like it.. A LOT! Michelle Lim's v nice..

Didn't have mtg with Fanny today cos she didn't work today.. apparently she was ill..

Chun Xiang.. I'm sorry.. bt.. like what u said... I shouldn't give ppl the wrong idea.. so.... I would rather nt give u the wrong idea.. u're a nice guy.. bt.. nt my kinda guy I suppose.. we cant seem to agree on the simplest things.. I know u'll get pissed if u know who's going aft me n all.. I know u'll get pissed if I talk on the hp more than to u.. I know...

I dun wanna think abt this anymore.. I'm getting v tired.. really.. tired..

Feeling drained.. v drained... I needa rest.... I needa relax...

Yest.... went for chocolate buffet with Qi Zhi n Shingo.. it wasn't all tt bad.. bt nt tt fantastic too.. no plc to sit.. so we ended up sitting on stairs..

Shingo n I went to IMM to look for Jack n Allan.. then Han Lun joined us.. went to Allan's plc for steamboat.. then went home..

Today was the 1st day of sch.. went to sch for AAA (Accounting Applications and Analysis) lecture.. didn't understand a thing so I dozed off.. then went to BTP for lunch.. played pool.. b4 going back to sch for OM (Operations Management).. was lame.. so Greg n I did cubes.. haha..

Saw a LARGE bunch of GLs at the atrium.. then I sat down n rot with them..

Dar called me.. n I went to look for her.. she's having sm probs with AK.. hope they'll work out.. I know tt she loves him a lot.. ak.. pls.. dun do this to her.. if she doesn't mean anything to u anymore.. pls dun hurt her like tt.. it pains me to see her like tt.. when she cry.. I hurt too.. I know how she feels.. I know how badly n deeply hurt she is.. pls..... dun hurt her...

Dar.. if there's anything.. tell me.. I love u.. I really do..

Junius.. thx bro.. thx for help me.. thx for everything..

Ok.. yest was tiring..

As usual.. tuition, kb, then work..
Had full house.. was SOOO bz.. bt sales was exceptionally gd... $7070.80..

Today..
Church.. Pastor Cheah's preaching is v gd.. abt having a soft tongue.. to forbear one another..
BS was gd too.. it's on Rom 10.. Josh's words struck me.. "The prob tt we have.. is nt tt we dunno where Christ is.. bt to look past the facts n see the truth.." Very true.. in this present time n age.. there're so many things blocking our view..

I need a breather...
Badly..
Urgently..
DESPERATELY..
I'm dying.....

Richard.. I.. I know what u've done.. I know n can see n feel all the effort tt u've put in.. I'm sorry for doing what I did.. n what I'm doing.. I know it's unfair to u.. I know tt it hurts.. n it might nt offer u any consolation.. bt I hurt too.. I guess u'll prob nv understand how I feel now.. bt I know how u feel.. n I'm sorry.. really am..
I know.. saying sorry is of no use.. what's done's done.. I know tt there's nth I can do to make u feel better too.. All I can do.. is to hope.. n pray for u.. tt u'll be happy.. tt u'll find happiness.. the best I can do now is to wish u all the best.. n.... let u heal with time..
I can't help if u wanna be pessimistic.. I can't help if u wanna do what u r.. cos.. I do tt A LOT too..
N no.. I dun hate u.. I dun have the right to..
U're nt unworthy.. it's juz the wrong timing..

Johnny.. pls.. get a hang of urself.. Ok.. I know u lied to me abt ur ex being the one u love most.. u called.. asked me if I could marry u.. if I could be ur gf.. if u could hug me..
I told u my ans.. No..
Pls.. dun waste ur time on me.. u're young.. younger than me.. concentrate on ur studies.. it's nt going to be ez to take ur 'O's as a private candidate.. dun put ur energy on other stuff..
N no.. I wun take the ring.. no matter how beautiful it'll be.. cos it's nt meant to be mine.. I know tt u wun give the ring to anyone else.. so.. dun buy.. pls.. I dun want u to waste ur $$..

Dar.. I know u care.. I know what I'm doing.. tt.. u dun hafta worry..
Pls dar.. take care of urself.. I know tt I've been v bz lately tt I dun have the time or chance to talk to u.. much less see u.. I dun even know tt u've been admitted last wk.. n I dunno y u suddenly fall sick today.. bt pls.. take care of urself.. I dun wanna lose u......

I can't lose anyone now..

My dad's telling me tt he's no longer superman.. he says tt he's abt to break.. tt he's migraine's hurting him so bad tt he's gotta take slping tablets to slp..

Shingo's nt exactly as healthy as he looks.. he's like another dar.. only tt he's condition's better..

God puts ppl in our lives for a purpose.. for a reason.. it's prob to make me stronger.. help me to cope.. help me in ways I dunno..
I know I can't demand anything frm U.. I know tt everything's within Ur plans..
I know there shouldn't be buts..

But I really can't lose anyone... anymore..
God.. help me..
Pls......

Back!

Today's the last day of baOC.. freedom! :P

The performance n all was gd.. my throat's hoarse frm all the shouting.. we didn't win anything though.. bt we enjoyed it.. :)

Dinner was at Black Canyon.. had a bit of conflict b4 tt.. bt nvm.. dinner was great..

Yest was quite a day.. did lotsa running ard.. n I lost my freshies..!! Dun ask me how I did it.. I have no idea too.. apparently.. the guys decided to walk on their own to canteen 1.. the gals walked to canteen 2.. n we led the rest of the ppl to canteen 3.. I was SOOO worried.. called them up.. n aft rushing thru my lunch.. which wasn't lunch cos I only ate like... at most 5 mouths.. then I went with Jian Wen to look for the guys.. I was quite pissed.. I scolded them the min I reached there.. Jian Wen gave them a piece of his mind too.. then met up with the gals.. which were led over by Wan Ching n Hui Xin..

Had a talk aft tt.. n all the SCs n SBs were SOOO tired.. most of us were falling aslp..

All the orientation events r finally over.. AT LAST!!!
Bt tt means tt hols r ending.. which means sch's starting.. n I haven't even started enjoying my hols..

Sigh..

What to do?

Woke up at 6 to meet dar.. then went home n changed up n left the house immediately.. n I thought I'll have time to slp.. sigh..

Freshies came.. my class has.. 17 ppl in all.. only 14 turned up.. they are all SOOOO QUIET!!!

I cheered till my voice turned hoarse.. bt.. what to do..
Ate Strepsils like sweets.. I know I know.. they aren't sweets...

Tmr's another long day.. have to be in sch by 7.. so I've gotta meet dar by 5.45.. meaning I muz wake up by 430.. oh my gdness.. tt's so early.. n I'm nt aslp yet..

I'm so hungry.. how to slp....

Sigh..

Will be leading cheer tmr.. with Clemence, Melvina, Wee Hoon, Zhi Wei n Benjamin.. muz preserve voice.. haha..

Juz finisheddoing my stuff..

Tmr's the BIG day.. freshies coming in..

Today.. we did a lot of stuff.. okok.. the performance team did a lot of stuff.. decor n all.. v tired..

Had breakfast at KAP's mac.. n dinner at KAP's mac.. I think tt it'll be my nxt common destination.. haha..

Took firewood frm SU.. going to have to return it..

Haha.. been staying in sch for too long.. Mdm Chong knows me.. n she trusts me with the store key.. cos.. by right.. the key cannot be given to others beside ex-co members.. yup..

Okok.. tired! Going to slp.. zzzz..

Went to xms today.. went there to be figure head.. juz to "show face"..

Aft tt, went down to NP to help..

I was quite upset..

Dar.. I know tt u meant it for gd.. bt it's quite sad.. I felt upset tt u did what u did.. bt I know tt it's for my gd.. u were concerned abt how ppl viewed me.. u didn't want me to be in the hot seat.. thx dar..

Shingo.. thx a lot.. when I needed someone.. u were there.. u came out early in the morning to acc me cos I was feeling upset.. totally lacked of slp cos of me.. so sorry.. then u gt scolded by ur dad cos u were waiting for me today.. sorry......

Went to church.. Nat n Richard came too.. yup..

Had singing.. was... ok..
Recording is on 4/6 for mass chior.. gals ensomble will be confirmed later..

Went to watch Coach Carter with Shingo.. nice show.. really nice.... had Thai Express for dinner.. Phat Thai.. nt v fantastic.. cos..... of Renn Thai's food.. :P

I..

I dunno.....

Richard.. I know u're nice n all.. I know tt u want so much to be more than a fren.. bt.. smtgs juz aren't tt simple.. smtgs aren't tt ez too....
I know u want me to forget him.. to move on.. u've done a lot.. u've tried..
Even if I dun choose u in the end.. know tt u'll always be a gd fren to me.. reallly.. u're great.. I.. dun want u to waste ur time on me.. I'm nt worth it.. u deserve someone better..

Shingo.. u're oso v nice.. u.. understand me.. prob due to the fact tt we've similar personalities.. although u say tt it takes one like pole to know another.. like poles usually repel..

Seriously.. I dun wanna hurt anyone of u.. bt in the process of liking me.. u'll def get hurt.. I'm so sorry.. bt I'm really nt worth all the pain n effort..

Really.. there're better gals out there.........

Didn't get to blog yest cos blogger was having maintainance..

Cant even rmb what I wanted to write abt yest.. nvm..

Today.. went for tuition.. saw him.. finally talked aft a LONG time.. then we went down to Orchard together.. he's leaving for Taiwan as I'm typing this.. wun be in Sg for abt a mth..

Went down to meet Shingo.. I felt so bad for making him wait for 1 hr.. I'm so sorry.. aft tt, we went to Wheelock Plc to service his hp.. when we pressed the no.. we were SHOCKED.. totally.. cos.. it was 0374.. n.. the no tt was on display was 0275.. no joke.. tt's like.. 100 no away.. so we decided to take a walk then go back.. aft walking a round round lvl 2, we went back.. n the no only went up by a bit.. 0277.. so we went to have dinner at Big O..
Nat came down with Daryl.. he's nt bad.. looked quite decent..
Anyway.. we ate.. n then went up.. juz in time.. :) So accurate..

Jack came down when Shingo n I were having cheesecake n hot chocolate at coffee bean.. aft tt, the 3 of us went to Lucky Plaza's mambo for pool..
When we juz exit the plc.. I saw Wee Kiat, Kai Shing n bunch of TCHS guys get outta the lift, heading towards mambo..

Walked back to the MRT station.. saw Chun Xiang on the way.. he wasn't v happy.. n he spoke with obvious sarcarsm in his voice, "So gd.. gt 2 guys acc u"

I dunno what's wrong.. I dunno what's up.. even if u were jealous.. or pissed.. or anything.. u shouldn't have done tt.. the both of them would have felt jealous of each other at some pt or another.. yet they could take it.. I feel tt u should have been more.. more..... magnanimous.. or more gentlemanly..

Jack.. I'm so sorry.. I felt real bad doing tt.. bt.. I guess it had to be done..

Shingo.. thx a lot.. *muacks* thx for acc me to eat ice cream n for sending me home.. for being so sweet.. telling me nt to think abt today bt concentrate on tmr.. cos today has alr passed.. to face tmr with a smile..

1 day down.. 1 more to go..

Convention today was OK.. yah.. tt's what EVERYONE says..

Everything was fine.. had a little hiccup here n there.. bt still ok.. nt tt bad.. :P

I rushed down to Janice's plc aft convention.. was SOOOO tired..

Today.. I had pain at my back.. waist area.. dunno y.. this.. dunno.. muz rest more.. REST MORE!

Zaed switched on the com.. n Pei Shi n I r using the com.. haha.. too bad.. we rule!

Tmr's the last day.. tmr n I'll be free frm convention! Then I've gotta do baOC.. okok.. 1 thing at a time... slowly...

I'm in sch.. n I'm using the com..

Ok.. came down.. went to learn a little dance for my performance for baOC.. then went for tuition.. had 2 tuition back to back.. tired..

Came back to sch.. then rested a while b4 heading down to BTP for dinner at Pizza Hut with James, Yeo Han, Sun Tian, Pei Shi, Jovin n Allan.. then went to play pool..

Had a bad headache.. AGAIN.. sigh...

Jack brought down a slice of chocolate cheese cake frm Baker's Inn.. it's VERY nice.. bt it caused an uproar in SU.. EVERYONE was commenting..

We're juz FRIENDS.. nth more.. sigh.. no point explaining.. see no point in it..

Yeah.. Nat.. I told u.. haha.. Daryl huh.. take things slow.. everything else...... wait.. God knows what's best.. yup.. wait..

N tt's what I'm going to do.. tt's what I can do.. tt's the only thing I can do...

Wait..

Pray..

n

Wait...

Dar.. I love u..

Went to teach tuition..

Now I'm feeling tired..

Aft tuition.. I had a splitting headache.. lasted for a long time.. at least 2 over hrs..

Prob it's cos I'm too tired..

Tmr.. supposed to meet for convention stuff at 930.. then needa meet for baOC at 10.. how in the world am I suppose to be able to do tt???

Sigh.. can I split myself into half.. can I?

Too bad.. I can't.......

Magnum Force busted us AGAIN..

I'm getting sick n tired of this.. pls.. if u can't do it.. juz say tt u can't do it.. dun come n waste everybody's time.. it's nt fun.. neither is it funny..

We're all tired..
All pissed..

Dun do this to us.....

Raquel is right.. if u can't do it.. juz tell us.. we'll take u out..

I'm sure we wun feel the loss...

Had rehearsal.. it was SCREWED UP..

Was quite pissed.. cos......

Harmonica Troupe's tchr was SOOOOO IRRITATING.. n demanding! They didn't attend the past rehearsals n now they come with so many requests.. FINE..

Everything was screwed..

I'll be staying in sch frm 11th-13th.. so it'll be another few days w/o seeing me blog..

So tired.. wanna slp.......

Aft rehearsal.. a bunch of us went to cine.. Wei Da, Pei Shi, Jack, Allan, Shingo, n I.. then met Robert, Weimin, Ken, Azli n 2 others.. reached there n saw Yong Tat, Valerie, Candace, Edwin, Kim, Wei Shi, n 2 other guys.. yah.. like a BIG FOC gathering at Cine.. haha..

Most of them went to catch a movie.. either Guess Who or Kingdom of Heaven.. the FNB ppl including Shingo went to play pool.. Robert played for a while then went to catch the movie Kingdom of Heaven.. which starts at 9pm..

Pei Shi n Jovin left early.. then the 5 of us went to have dinner at LJS.. walked to Orchard MRT station to take a train home..

I saw Lionel, Equan n gang at the MRT station.. yupz.. then went home.. cos I'm SOOOO TIRED!!!

I wanna slp!!!

This is.. requested of the ppl there.. tt I take a pic with him.. yah..
So... since it's his bday......

Okok.. I know the resolution for this 2 pics aren't tt gd.. bt they're taken using a cam hp.. so bear with it..
This is Richard's bday cake.. Blueberry cheesecake.. bought frm Takashimaya B2.. nice.. :)

Is it juz me.. or am I really getting more temperamental..

Ok.. I juz gt pissed by Chun Xiang.. stop..

He called me.. to call him.. to talk.. ok.. I did..

Then.. he complained tt I was more interested in the lap top n the msn convo than him..

He asked for nat's no.. claiming tt he'll go aft her n dump me..

Ok.. WHATEVER.. like as though he'll be able to do so.. cos to me.. 'dumping' occurs when u like the other party n tt party rejects..

He said tt it'd be more meaningful to talk to nat then to me..

Stop.. stop.. STOP!

1stly.. IF u like me... PLS for gdness sake.. like me for who I am.. n nt for who u want me to be.. everyone is unique.. can't take me? Then do me a favour.. do urself a favour.. LEAVE.. I'm sure I wun feel the loss..

I'm SICK n TIRED of living the way others want me to.. TIRED of being what others wanna see..

2ndly.. I CANNOT concentrate on smtg.. I tend to multi-task.. somehow.. it makes me feel more comfortable.. even during exams.. I do nt have 100% concentration on my paper.. my mind tend to wonder.. so.. IT'S NT MY FAULT!!!

3rdly.. I do it to everyone.. ask those who know me.. Dar.. Nat.. Richard.. I'm like this.. it's the same logic.. I'm stubborn.. I multi-task the way I do.. It's ME..

Can't handle loneliness n pain? Then u can FORGET abt handling me.. cos my life's made up of it.. pieces here n there.. different kinds of pain.. n loneliness..

Can't take what I'm saying? GO AWAY then.. I dun need u here..

Went to church today.. was v tired..

Derrick's having high fever.. I sponged him thru the nite so I didn't really slp.. so tired..

Richard came to church.. had breakfast at macs.. nat, richard n me.. it was raining cats n dogs.. so.. we took a cab to church..

Had a "Let's Talk it Over" session which dragged.. so we didn't have lessons..

Had choir practise.. I sang till my voice became hoarse.. sigh..

Having rehearsal tmr.. dunno how it'll turn out.. hope it'll be fine.....

Tired...
Exhausted...

Hey ppl! I'm back!!!

Yeah.. someone's alr came up n asked me y I haven't been blogging.. well.. apparently u havent been reading indepth.. cos I rmb stating tt I'll be in camp for a wk.. nvm.. anyway I'm back alr..

Camp's been fun.. tiring.. interesting..

Camp has the theme of Odessey.. the camp head, Weimin is known as Zeus.. then there're other Greek gods.. the camp crew's known as the Olympians.. there're 4 grps.. Argive, Elean, Spartan n Trojan..

Spartan has a freshie which the camp crew named as Spartan tai tai.. cos she brought in her luggage.. no kidding.. as in the one with the rollers n the handle.. she's horrible.. she's the only freshie who puts on make-up to a camp.. like.. who in the world puts on make up to a camp?!? Whatever.. then.. aft nite walk.. she actually stopped outside one of the lifts to see how badly her eyeliner is running.. then.. she injured her leg.. bt.. she didn't allow Kai Xiang to touch her cos...? Her shoes r new.. the best thing's tt.. she wanted someone to carry her luggage for hercos of her injury.. n someone was willing.. n instead of thanking the wonderful guy.. she told him nt to dirty the handle.. (-_-" Oh pls.. dun let her be in business.. although I've a strong hunch she might.. Oh pls...... *hopes*

Azli gt busted.. one of the freshies.. came.. registered.. then told him tt she gotta go to the bus stop to wait for her fren.. so he acc her out.. he had blisters on his leg so he couldn't walk fast.. the gal.. saw a cab approaching.. dashed out.. flagged the cab.. n left..

Haha.. hilarious rite?

All these "jokes" r pasted on welfare room's glass panel.. juz for laughs..

Oh!!! U know.. for my identification card.. they put my name.. the word BANGALA.. n guess which dept I'm in.. Sai Gang Squad.. actually.. all camp crew is under Sai Gang Squad.. cos we're running everything.. interesting yah?

Pei Shi n I are the only 2 gals in the FNB, Campfire team.. the rest r guys.. Jovin, Jack, Allan, Wei Da, Yeo Han, Han Jie, Han Lun, Sun Tian, Sun Lai n Lek Meng.. Jack, Lek Meng n I r oso part of Welfare dept.. so basically.. whatever I do, I'll do it with Pei Shi.. haha.. snatched Jovin's gf.. :P so bad.. who cares..

Allan's frm BIT.. same orientation grp.. I juz found out.. haha.. all frm The Ring.. n I found out when he started the "Steady Bom Bi Bi" cheer..

Today.. went to Cherie's plc.. n her mum started bombarding me.. said tt I'm irresponsible n all.. kinda pissed me off.. bt I can't talk back.. ARGH!!!! Pissed... nvm.. it's alr over..

N I'm alr tired..

Went for kb.. n aft kb went to meet Richard.. had dinner at Swensens.. I paid cos it's his b'day.. bought clothes at This Fashion.. went to cuppage to play pool with YanXi n fren..

I gt Richard to go to macs to buy yogurt for me while we prepared the cake n all.. yanxi bought a blueberry cheesecake.. nt bad..

Okok.. I really hafta slp.. only slept for at most 3 hrs per nite during camp.. n I did A LOT of crap.. shifting boxes, drinks, igloo..

I'm SHAGGED!!!!!! Nitez..

I'm in sch alr.. sigh.. so tired.. extremely tired..

Juz finished my prog.. later going to work..

Richard acc me to church yest.. then we went down to orchard.. he met his frenz n I went to work..

Yest's work was.. quite smtg.. 2 straight days of FULL house.. almost DIED working.. haha..

There's this table of 12 China ppl yest.. their attitude totally sucks.. they didn't order the food n they kept complaining tt their food haven't arrive.. they have SOOO many requirements.. What to do.. The customer is always right.. sigh.. IRRITATING..

Tired.. v tired..

Jia Wei.. I'm so sorry.. I didn't know tt u went down.. I thot u didn't.. so I didn't bother to wake up.. bt I actually woke up at abt 8.. so sorry..

Went for tuition..

Met Qi Zhi.. thx a lot for tt bottle of red bull.. I needed it..

Had a mtg in NYP.. then kb.. Sparred quite a bit n sustained quite a no of injuries.. left 2nd toe swollen.. right 2nd toe oso a bit swollen.. knee bruised.. back aching frm the fall..

Worked.. FULL house.. I was literally acting like a mad lady.. calling out for ppl to clear n set tables for me.. running in n out.. EXHAUSTED..

Had supper at cuppage.. then went home..

Smtg's up with Jason.. bt I dunno what..

Wan Cai's upset cos he quarrelled with his gf.. n he's nt answering my calls..

Chun Xiang msged me a 4 pg long sms to tell me abt how he feels n all.. n I replied him with a 3 pg long reply.. I dunno.. it's like.. he's so pessimistic n all.. I dun see the pt of anything.. he doesn't want pain n loneliness.. then I replied tt if it's like tt.. he can't handle a rlsp cos the things tt he doesn't wanna face is part of a rlsp.. n he can forget abt handling me cos pain n loneliness is a component of me..

I'm aching all over... I should go rest now.. nitez ppl..