I know I haven't been blogging for a long while..

I've decided to blog today because it's 5 months!

Yeah..
We've been thru ups and downs..
Quarrelled..
Disagreed..
Cried..
Laughed..
I thank God that we're still together..

At times it may hurt..
At times it may seem like everything done is for nought..
But I'm glad God helped us to tide thru it all..

It hasn't been easy..
It never is..

Many times we feel lonely..
Lost..
Confused..
But we're still holding on..
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If you all have the chance..
Do watch the chinese show - Yesterday once more..
Acted by Andy Lau and Sammi Cheng..
That..
Is a classic example of love..
and I cried till my eyes almost dropped out..

Will write a summary of it if I can..
When I can..

Have been too choked by the workload to the extent that I don't have time to breathe..
much less blog..

Picked up a few nice quotes along the way....

~To give and not expect return, that is what lies at the heart of love. - Oscar Wilde ~
~ I have found the paradox that if I love until it hurts, then there is no hurt, but only more love. - Mother Theresa ~

How would you like it if someone gave you hopes and shattered it..
How would you take it if someone keeps you hanging on a thread..

I definitely won't like it..

I'm sorry if I've done it to anyone of you before..
especially to you, baby..
I really don't mean it..

As for you..
I know this isn't your first time doing it..
I've seen it happen more than once now and I can say that I hate what you've done..

You SHOULD NOT play with a person's feelings..
You SHOULD NOT play mind games..
Please..
If in any case..
You should have been straight forward of the whole matter..
Whatever it is regarding..
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You..
I have no idea what happened..
and in a way I think that it's good that I don't know..

If it is as what I've heard,
you only have yourself to blame for the current situation..
DON'T expect me to clean up the mess for you..
You created this..
You clean it up YOURSELF..
Not that I expect you to do anything about it..
You'll probably end up influencing other people in attempt to get them to do whatever you want them to..
Just as you have done before..

Be thankful that I decided not to make things worst by telling those involved what you told me about them..
I'm not like you..

Do not be so cowardly and use your "authority" on the few of us because you view us to have the ability to outshine you..
IF you have what it takes..
Show it..
If you don't..
Just shut up and do as you're given..

There're times you make me feel like I'm the diamond in the rough..
Or likened to a pearl in your hand..
Precious..
Unique..
To be treasured..

Sometimes..
You render me helpless..
Make me feel useless..
Inapt..
Unable..

You tell me you don't trust me fully..
That you've got doubts..
That your dreams feel so real..

I can't blame you for having the fear of losing me..
but to the extent that you've got doubt in me.....
I find that terrifying..

Don't worry so much..
Don't think so much..
Although you claim that it gives you "preparation",
in being "prepared" for it might actually let it happen..

I don't blame you for being unable to trust my guy friends..
Afterall, you don't know them..
But at least have that trust for me..
And most importantly..
Trust in God..
In being so doubtful,
You're actually doubting God most..

Baby..
You're special..
You're important..
and maybe you don't know how much you mean to me..
You really mean A LOT..

NOTHING happens by chance..
There's no such thing as "Just so happened"..
You didn't "happen" to be there when I needed someone..
You didn't "happen" to give that extra care and concern..
God placed you there..
God made you care..

I thank God for you..
and I thank you for all you've done..

Baby..
You don't have to do more..
What you've done..
and given..
is enough..

If..
you see me as a diamond..
Don't let go..
Don't doubt that one day you'll drop the diamond..
Don't push the diamond away..

Back after a LONG break..

I'm sorry for not blogging.. the internet was down due to the Taiwan earthquake.. only got it back on Fri.. then I was out till today.. yup..

Spent new year's eve having a barbeque with Clar, baby, Brian, Desmond, Kelvin and Marc.. then, baby, Clar, Brian and I went to esplanade at around 1+ and stay there till 6+ in the morning to catch a bus back.

New year's day was spent having a steamboat over at one of the steamboat houses in bugis to celebrate Brenda's birthday.. after that, we went down to Bungalow to have a drink and some side dishes..

Yest was spent with baby, Clar, Brian and one of Brian's friends, Angeline.. We had "tea" at Ding Tai Fung.. then dinner at Billy Bombers..

Had a fun filled time these few days.. Thanks to all..

On the early morning of New Year's day, down at esplanade.. the 4 of us saw this person (we don't know if it's a man/woman cos he/she's wearing a mask) swimming in the Singapore River in a long sleeved shirt and pants..
We supposed that that person (most probably a guy if we judge from the dressing) was dared by "his" peers because we heard cheering when "he" was returning to shore..

First of all, I do not understand why some one would want to endanger his life like that..
the river..
although not shark-infested might be home to other meat-eating sea creatures..
besides, it was quite badly littered that night cause of all the celebrations that were happening in that area.

Secondly, I would not consider that bunch of people who dared "him" to go swimming as friends
because friends would not ask "him" to do something as dangerous as that..
They might have been drunk or high on alcohol but still, life is not something to be played around with.

If they were trying to attract attention..
Congratulations..
You've gotten a few short paragraphs of write-up on my blog..

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When something's lost..
should you read into it?

I would have to say that I haven't really been very fervent..
I haven't been reading the bible a lot..
but the church issue at hand really affects me a lot..

A difference in view can actually tear 2 sister churches apart although we share the same belief..

If it can happen to 2 churches who have been together for numerous years..
A difference in view can tear couples apart too..
Can't it..

Whenever prayed,
"Thy will be done"..
It's not to be meant..
I know what you want BUT..
It's to be meant..
Do unto me what You think is best for me..

No..
I do not want to give up..
Yes..
We're facing problems..
in different sizes..
various intensity..
Maybe..
it's cos we're nt ready..
or of other reasons we have no idea of..
but I won't give up so soon..
I'll fight on..
until I'm suppose to stop..

~ I lost my heart.. is it supposed to mean something? ~