Hi.. Went to work today.. gt lots to write.. lotsa stuff tt I've been thinking abt today..

Dear.. if u're reading this.. juz read on..

Should I accept another person into my life? I dunno.. maybe it's cos I'm used to singlehood.. maybe 11 over mths is long.. I.. dunno y I feel insecure.. even when there's smone there.. I still feel this way.. cos I prob dun wanna be hurt.. cos I still cannot get over it.. I've still nt healed.. n I guess I nv will.. bt if tt's going to hinder me to trust others.. I guess I'll prob remain like this for the rest of my life..

I'm sorry for appearing inconfident.. sorry for being this way.. sorry for being me..

Think I'm weak yet? Haha.. prob I'm juz gd at portraying it.. cos I'm nt.. if I am.. I guess I wun be able to last till now.. I would have found someone else soon aft he broke with me.. bt.. I won't deny tt at times I do appear weak.. I will nt..

This time.. I've gotta admit tt I'm afraid.. scared.. I dun want things to repeat.. dun want history to happen again.. nt now.. nt ever.. cos I know how it works.. I know how painful it can get.. I know.. who'd hurt.. n the extent of it..

Seems like I'm nt trusting u again God.. sigh.. brings me back to the BS we had today.. yest I mean.. on the topic "struggling within me" this particular verse frm Romans 7.. vs 19.. "For that good that I would I do not: but the evil which I would not, that I do" Seems the same here.. it's so hard to juz trust.. I would want to.. bt tt I don't do.. it's human to worry although I dun want to.. I still do it.. God.. help me..