I felt the sense of loneliness again.. this time.. it's a total new sense of it.. smhow.. it's a different type of it.. sigh.. dunno what's my feelings r telling me.. they seem to be getting worst.. God.. help me.. control my emotions..

I feel SOOOO hypocritical.. on one hand.. I'm here feeling the way I am.. n on the other I'm trying to help my fren with her prob.. the same feeling.. I.. sigh.. I dunno..

At times.. I really do feel tt I'm nt a gd person.. yeah.. I know tt u juz told me today tt I'm a nice person.. bt.. I dun believe it.. sorry.. sorry for nt having the confidence.. sorry for being the way I am.. prob this is the only way I can carry on.. prob tt's y I felt the way I was feeling.. the way I'm feeling.. cos maybe.. this is the way I'll carry on for the rest of my life..

If u ppl think tt I'm starting to sound despondent.. maybe I am.. maybe it's cos too many things have been happening in my life.. maybe it's cos I've finally "gained enlightenment".. maybe it's cos I'm still stuck to him.. maybe it's cos I've let him go.. maybe it's cos he's still a part of my life.. maybe it's cos he has been a part of my life.. maybe..

If we were still together.. yest would have been a memorable day.. it would have been 1 yr.. time passes so fast.. now.. in 1 more mth.. it'll be 1 yr.. for me.. 1 day b4 tt will be 1 yr.. for them.. n I didn't even realise.. until nurul reminded me.. hmm.. dunno what tt's supposed to mean.. probably.. juz maybe.. I'm walking out.. bt I dunno.. it's juz.. MAYBE...